Anger is a healthy and normal emotion. This emotion sometimes stems from feeling annoyed, displeasure or receiving some hostility. But it is both unhealthy and sometimes dangerous when it suddenly bursts. Persistent anger outbursts has consequences towards a lot of things in your life like your relationships, work, health, and even mental well being. There are healthy ways to control your outbursts. I have here ways to manage anger.
Vent to Someone
Talking to someone when you’re angry is very therapeutic. This is often helpful for stuff that you can no longer keep in (duh). Based on research, men often vent when they are looking for help or advise on something. Women on the other hand vent just because they want someone to listen to. So take note of this whenever you become the receiving end of this vent. However, if someone is venting constantly about the same topic, it is no longer therapeutic. It becomes bad for the mind, body, spirit and even towards the people surrounding your. It’s then called being obsessed.
Take a Deep Breaths
You need to calm down before you talk to someone. If you don’t, you might end up saying something that you’ll regret. Clear your mind and initiate your body’s calming response by taking a deep breath. You can try these three steps:
- Inhale through your nose slowly for 3-5 seconds.
- Pause for 3 seconds.
- Slowly exhale through pursed lips (like whistling).
This will surely calm your body and mind. The point of the exercise is to calm yourself down. Whether you want to keep the anger bottled in because you can handle it, or you want to talk to someone because you can’t hold it in anymore. Taking a deep breath will help.
Detach yourself from the situation
Sometimes, people find themselves in a situation where whatever they say or do projects their angry aura. No matter how hard these people try to hide it, they can’t. If you find yourself in this situation, best thing to do is to take a walk to help calm your mind and body. Yes a walk. Sometimes sitting and playing games won’t help. Walk around, drive around and see things. Point is, you need to move around and see things that constantly change. Like the waves of the sea, people walking, or trees dancing in the wind. You’ll end up a lot calmer and be able to talk to people without projecting any negativity.
Friendly confrontation
If you’re angry towards a person, you need to talk to them. However, don’t talk to them immediately! You need to calm down, relax, and recompose your thoughts. You might end up punching someone in the face. The tips above can help. Once you’re calmed down, talk to this person in a calm and civilized manner. It would help if someone mitigated for the both of you. Someone with no idea of what’s happening sometimes helps because they are unbiased and can see the situation from a fresh perspective.
I hope these steps can help you express your anger in a healthier way.